I may be one of the most feared guards of the Volturi, but there are always thoughts brewing in my mind.  One thought, one wish in particular has plagued me for centuries.  Nobody knows that I admired Carlisle Cullen when he was part of our coven.  Not admired like a boyfriend, but more like a father.  A father I deserved.  My biological father was not one to admire at all.  In my childhood, I might as…

Just when I began to believe that Alec wouldn't ever return to Volterra, he surprises me by returning.  I am elated that he is back.  I've spent countless months...almost a year all alone.  Since he had left, I was never really myself.  My brother is the other half of the puzzle.  The other half of my life.  Without him, everything just becomes dull and lifeless.  When he left, I felt as if I was in my own solitary shell.  Nobody would come and visit me.  Nobody would invite me out.  It was…

"There are no options for those who break the rules."

I've said it before and I will, without hesitance, say it again. There are NO options for those who break the rules!!! As a coven who is feared by all vampire covens worldwide: must our fellow Volturi be given an exception? I have been pondering much over this inquiry. With everything that has been happening between Demetri and Corin, their lust for each other seems to be getting in the way of their true duties. Blinded by "love"…

Having had countless hours, months on end, I've found myself wandering the halls of the Volturi Castle a lot more than usual.  When I've completed my duties for the day and night, once I am dismissed, I don't always go straight to my chambers.  Lately, the need to walk the castle grounds has been an itch.  As I've stated previously, I've returned to the castle…

Being immortal, you see the same occurrences every day.  However, night time is when I can roam free around downtown Volterra without drawing attention at myself.  Unfortunately, during the wee early mornings, all I see are drunkards and easy women throwing themselves at these men.  Intoxication by liquor isn't something that is very becoming of humans.  I might also add that the taste of their blood is not as glorious as when they are sober and full of fear.  

Since the…

It has been a while since I've felt the comfort of the Volturi's castle walls.  Alec and I had left the castle with the intent on never returning.  We thrived for adventure outside of the castle and that, we did.  However, after a while, things weren't as wonderful as I thought it would be.  Eventually, things turned boring.  We began to see the same routine that humans would partake in.  Their entire lives are built on sleep, food, and work.  Not to say that we don't do that ourselves.  But…

Things around the castle have been quiet.  A little too quiet.  I recall during these times a couple centuries ago when the castle would become quiet.  Alec, Carlisle, myself, and a few of the other guard would make certain that the silence and calm would not last long.  Today, as I sit in the silent castle, I find myself surprisingly missing the company of my old friend, Carlisle.  I am well aware that I have my biological brother, Alec, whom I love with all my being.  Carlisle, when he was…

As of recently, I was plagued by a bout of "wishful thinking," as many people call it.  I had been wandering the castle grounds by myself.  Alec was preoccupied with whatever it was he was doing in his chambers.  All I know is when I came by and knocked, all I heard was whooshing noises.  He must have been playing.  I didn't want to disturb anyone else in the castle to ask if they'd like to accompany me as I patrolled the castle. 

Everything was very quiet.  The tourists, also…

My human memories seem to be disappearing the longer I am what I am.  Most of the memories that still remain are those of my brother, Alec, and myself.  Most other things that occurred in my human life are a blur.  I blame most of it because I don't often think about anything else besides the betrayal of my mother and father against Alec and I.  Therefore, the only memories I…

Humans are so easily amused and excited.  It perturbs me greatly.  I can't help but wonder if I was as naive as the human children I see today, chasing each other with weapons that shoot water.  Doesn't it only further engrain the violent nature that humans seem to have for killing one another?  Summers bother me because it seems I am always surrounded by unintelligent humans.  A good meal is always tainted with the bitter taste of alcohol.  Can't humans of age have a summer without…

I never thought I'd say this, but I am getting bored of the same routines around the castle.  If the guard, including myself, are not busy with duties, we seem to be planning pranks on each other.  Ever since my brother returned from his absence in the castle, we've pranked each other and pranked our siblings.  Even our dear mother, Sulpicia by dying her horse.  However, the pranks are becoming abundant and repetitious.  I have grown older over the centuries.  I keep the childish act for the…

I sat in my chambers, turning on my stereo to enjoy some music. I collect rare records as a hobby of mine. However, I do enjoy a few modern artists.  One artist I enjoy listening to is Tori Amos.  Her piano playing and voice is so full of feeling.  Her music is very melodic.  I was pleased when the gentle keys were pressed, causing the beautiful song playing on the stereo: "Winter" by Tori Amos.

"Snow can wait, I forgot my…

I recall watching the ocean of people in the streets.  It was some sort of celebration and the bars were just closing.  There's one person in particular that caught my eyes.  A well-built, muscular man wearing a blue polo shirt.  Watching him stumble over himself causes me to laugh loudly.  His bright blue eyes catch my onyx pair.  There was no hiding anymore.  Instead, I hover by the tree I had been hiding behind, trying to lure him over.  Still stumbling, he approaches me slowly.  It…

My mother and father,

I am aware that you are no longer alive.  You are, I hope, exactly where you both should be: in the inferno.  That's right!  I hope you both are eternally burning!  How dare the both of you not fight to keep Alec and I from being tied up like witches on a stick, suspended over a burning fire!  How could any parent subject their children to that torture and not do everything they could to keep them from a fate such as the one Alec and I were thrown into?!?  I'll…

Things around the castle have been unsettling and different.  I've been keeping my mind occupied after the events that have occurred.  This is what has been keeping me from going on an unnecessary bloodbath.  I will not admit the emotions I may (or may not) be feeling after losing Demetri and Heidi overnight.  Those emotions (if they exist) are for only me to know and for me to deal with in my own way.

Now that I don't have Demetri and Heidi to poke fun of about their obvious love for…

I remember last Christmas as if it happened yesterday.  The absence of my brother was so surreal, it was hard for me to handle.  For centuries, even back when we were both human, we had always spent Christmas together.  We used to be inseparable until he had departed from the castle and went on his "search for himself."  Last Christmas is one that I will never forget because for once in my life, I felt true loss.  When my mother and father died, I felt no loss.  They deserved what they got…

With the impending holiday season upon us and the re-arrival of my dearest brother, Alec to the castle, I felt that I am obligated to express the many things that I am thankful for.  I find it only fitting since Thanksgiving is near.  Many individuals may be curious as to what exactly someone like me could be thankful for.  Now is your chance to get that question answered!

First and foremost, I am thankful for my brother, Alec.  He has returned to the castle after being gone…

Every now and then, I like to indulge and depart on my own personal vacations.  Since I really have not seen #Alec in a very long time, it is, admittedly, easier to plan for my vacations when I'm going alone.  I had heard about a place in the States called Long Beach, California.  How it was so pleasant and with beaches that stretched on forever.  I wanted to experience it for myself.  I thought it'd be nice to take nightly strolls along the beach, barefoot. 

Upon arriving in…