November passed with me learning better control of my lust for human blood. I found myself finding reasons to be near Carlisle, finding a warmth in his eyes and smile and a strong bond of trust. Edward entertained us with the piano and we all took turns reading to each other from Shakespeare’s Sonnets and occasionally reading a play or two. Other authors found their way into our hands and some nights, we sat playing cards and games. Carlisle taught me to play chess and soon, I was beating…

My Immortal

Sung by: Evanescence



Lyrics!



I'm so tired of being here

Suppressed by all my childish fears

And if you have to leave

I wish that you would just leave

'Cause your presence still lingers here

And it won't leave me alone



These wounds won't seem to heal

This pain is just too…

Christmas time is once again on our doorstep and once again, as crazy driven as ever. People rushing to the stores to get gifts for everyone they care about. Never really having had a lot of money in the family, it helped me stay more in touch with the traditional side of Christmas. Being surrounded by family and friends, in my case as well, with mom being from another tribe, it gave me insight into two different tribe's traditions on this time of year. Every year, mom and I decorate the…

This is such a beautiful and touching letter.  It is very true too.

I had not anticipated the difficulty of the journey to Ohio. I started out at the railway station but the overwhelming smell of the human blood almost drove me to a frenzy. I made it two steps in and had to force myself to run out. I ran off into the streets, flames of thirst scorching my throat, burning away the reason Carlisle had tried to teach me. I found myself in an alley facing a thug with a knife. I didn’t have to have Edward’s talent to know what he was thinking and before he could…

As you all know, there was recently a shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut, just not even 12 short miles away from my school. The shooter was also seen the night before outside of my dormitory building. I just ask each and every one of you here to please pray for every one of the 26 lives lost at Sandy Hook, 20 of which are children and 6 adults. My best friend's little cousin was one of the first victims of the shooting, and one of the jazz professors here at…

I worked at keeping my plans from my mind whenever I knew Edward was around. I didn’t want him to know, or to tell Carlisle. I busied myself cleaning the house, arranging the furniture and going out to walk when I felt my thoughts intruding.  Carlisle found me out walking and joined me, never saying a word. He would point out flora and fauna, telling me what he knew about them. I found myself distracted and intrigued by him and wanted to know more of his history.

When I…

My adjustment in the first few days was spent learning from Carlisle abut vampires. It took some getting used to, the fact I didn’t get tired or need sleep, the speed and power. My newborn hunger was ever present, though, and there were many hunting trips. Carlisle and Edward both explained that they didn’t feel it necessary to attack humans when the animal blood did just as well to slake the thirst. I could see it was easier for them, having been this way for much longer, since I felt the…

Over the past few weeks, I have been looking back at 2012 and thinking about what 2013 will bring.  2012 was a year of change for me, some good and some bad.  I certainly made some big changes in my life and it wasn't easy so I hope that in 2013, things will be easier in some respects.

In 2013, I hope that I can find the right career path for myself. At this time, I still have no idea what it is I wish to do in life and since leaving my previous job in Sept 2012, I have tried to work…

Is there any songs anybody wants the lyrics to in a different language? Im bored. I know 66 different languages.

Afrikaans, Albanian, Arabic, Armenian, Azerbaijani, Basque, Belarusian, Begali, Bulgarian, Catalan, Chinese(simplified), Chinese(Traditional), Crontian, Czech, Danish, Dutch, English(of course), Esperanto, Estonian, Filipino, Finnish, French, Galician, Georgian, German, Greek, Gujarati, Haitian Creole, Hebrew, Hindi, Hungarian, Icelandic, Inonesian, Irish, Italian,…

I was confused. Everything felt like it was electrified, as if there were a summer storm in my brain. Colors were so intense, I thought if I touched them they would spill onto me. I could smell things I never noticed, the earth, grass, a bird, and…strangely, pears and lavender.

I could hear every heartbeat, the breath of creatures I couldn’t see. What I didn’t hear were the heartbeats of the two men standing in front of me.

I knew Doctor Cullen, although I…

There was nothing. I lay at the shoreline at the bottom of the cliff, broken in body and spirit. The will to live had left me, and I wished for the end to come. I knew it hadn’t happened yet, as I was aware of the sounds of Lake Superior, the wind, the wildlife. But I saw nothing, felt nothing. I couldn’t have moved if I wanted to, and that was fine with me. I wished to become a part of nature now, and to disappear in her embraces.

I heard the people find me, the sounds of…

That feeling of hope followed me into Illinois then Wisconsin. I arrived at my cousin’s house and received a warm welcome. Being with real family again was good for my soul, and as I started to show in my pregnancy, the spark of hope fanned.

Just before Christmas, I found out that Charles had discovered where I was and knew I was carrying his child. The family gathered and planned a way for me to leave before he arrived to collect me. They were going to tell him that I had…

With Charles’s return home, my world became gray and bleak again. His attitude hadn’t changed, if anything, it was worse. He had learned in his time away how to hide what he was doing to me, making sure not to leave a visible mark. Although he didn’t realize it, there were visible marks on me, noticed in my demeanor.

Knowing it would be suspect if he returned and we suddenly shut off our charitable work, he allowed us to continue. He was a smart man, and realized that Papa’s…

The wedding was planned and executed, and on December 19, 1917, I became Esme Anne Evenson. We didn’t honeymoon with Christmas so close, but there were promises of travel to come. Since Charles had only been renting a room to live in, we stayed at the farm with my parents. Charles insisted we take a room at the opposite end of the house and on the third floor, away from my parents to allow us some privacy. We did spend the first two nights at his rented room. Mama had talked to me about the…

Much to everyone’s relief, Papa continued to get better. We lived each day to the fullest, knowing that he could go anytime. He delegated his work in town to his employees, only going in to his office once a week, choosing to spend more time on the farm with us. The fresh air and exercise being on the farm seemed to help him and we saw steady improvement.

I was able to graduate and go to university, studying to get my teachers certification. I dreamed of teaching somewhere…

It doesn't feel like it's the Holidays yet...even when it already is.

A few years ago, I get to spend Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and New Year's Eve with my family, but then in the course of five or six years, everything has changed.

No one died, don't worry, but they all went away. Some left for Ireland and most are went for New York. Far places from home.

Ever since, it never felt...happy. To me and the remaining family I have here, which is not that many as it used…

Papa had me set up in our window seat with my leg propped on pillows. He had gone to the alchemist and gotten morphine, but I didn’t like the way it made me feel. The pain in my leg wasn’t too unbearable most of the time. School had started before I broke my leg, and the teacher sent lessons home for me, Mama helped as much as she could and Papa helped at night.  Nancy, our servant, brought me food and puzzles, and sat with me when my parents couldn’t.

I spent the first few…

Autumn, 1911

The day was one of those sweet autumn days, the kind that has the last warm breath of summer and the first hints of the coming winter.  The leaves were just starting the chameleon dance, slowly losing the green in favor of the warm shades of red, rust, auburn, and yellow. I couldn’t resist climbing up into my favorite spot, finding my branch, tucking my knees up under my chin and looking out over the lands.

Papa hated that I wore trousers and…