Nestled away amongst the large Fir trees I find the cabin is small, welcoming but cosy. I can't even begin to put into words how incredibly grateful I am for this solitude.

Watching as the fire crackles and the flames climb higher I curl up in this old but comfy chair, my blanket wrapped firmly around me and my cup of tea firmly between my hands my emotions have finally caught up with me and my tears stream unchecked down my face. All I can think about is my family, missing Harry so much I feel my heart might break and missing my kids just as much if not more tha I feel it already has.

With nothing but time now on my hands the memories of the past come flooding back, good and bad alike, but I don't care anymore any memory I can relive Harry is welcomed no matter the pain, no matter the cost. Our children being born, our wedding, our first kiss and the first time he held my hand. Though these memories, some of which I've shared might not seem so significant, it is these little moments, the ones you might miss if your not paying attention. But looking back that's what your heart seeks, those moments when he looks into your eyes and smiles just for you, when he whispers in you ear, when there is no need for whispering, when he puts his arm around you and pulls you close. If I close my eyes I can see him he is right here, I can almost feel him, almost hear his voice, picking up my journal and pen I begin to write and hopefully do justice to these memories

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