They are not dead, who live in the hearts they leave behind - Tuscarora

All I had ever wanted was a family of my own, a husband and children and I consider myself blessed that both of those dreams cam true. Along with my wedding day, the biryh of my children were the happiest moments of my life.

We are a small but close community, friends who are more like family, we have all watched out for each others children and so it was with great sadness that I watched many friends move away, none more so than John and Alice Lune or Julia Uley, leaving Sam and Collin behind, I know and understand why my friends left but it still hurts. It will never compare with the pain of losing my good friend Sarah Black, but it was sad and most definately hard looking at both Sam and Collin, knowing they missed their parents, knowing how much they were going through but not wanting to intrude upon their personal space can be a very hard line to walk.

I hope I have helped over the years, its nothing to find Collin and I at the kitchen table, putting a resonable size dent into a batch of muffins or a newly baked cake whilst talking the afternoon away and you can often find Sam and I walking along the beach deep in discussion. Thankfully I have not seen him as upset as he was the day he accidentally injured Emily, that was a terrible tragedy and one that I feared at first, would bring Sam undone. Thankfully it didn't, in fact I think it made them a stronger couple. My heart still breaks a little when I think how much hurt Leah has gone through but I do not blame Sam or Emily, its just the way things are.

It's comforting to know that neither of them are completely on their own, Collin still has his grandfather and Sam has Emily and Ayasha, even Rebecca, Rachel and Jacob who I once worried for constantly, are not alone in this life despite their terrible loss, they have Billy who is a wonderful father, not to mention they all have significant others these days.

Either way, I hope that I have helped, I hope that just by listening I have made some sort of difference in their lives and I hope that the fact, that our chats continue is because I am doing something right.

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Comment by Sue Clearwater on November 26, 2010 at 10:02am
Thank you both so much for your kind words and Sam I will always be there for you.

Sue xx

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