Mother's Day gift

[Rebecca Black Finau]

The pain was the worst pain I have ever felt in the world. It was like my insides were dying, I never thought it would be so intense. I squeezed Solomon's hand tightly as my contractions got closer and closer together, waiting for Dr. Cullen to get me to the operating room for a c-section. Laying there, staring at Leo, I got more and more scared and anxious. What if she wasn't healthy, or breathing? What if I did something wrong through the pregnancy? Then the horrible questions like, What if my daughter hates me already? or, What if I'm not a good enough mom to her? The only thing that got my thoughts to stop and realize that everything will be okay, the sound of her first cry. It almost made me cry as I looked at Leo who was looking back at me; We were both overjoyed at that moment. 

I had always feared becoming a mom. Maybe because I no longer have mine, or maybe because I wasn't sure I'd succeed. There is one thing I realized on May 10th, 2015 at 10:18 P.M. and that is that I have never heard or seen a more beautiful baby than that moment. 

I hold her in my arms now and fall in love even more, with each little movement or noise she makes, it's just overwhelming joy. 

The course of my pregnancy with Aliikai was not easy. It consisted of gestational diabetes and hypertension, leading to the diagnoses of preeclampsia which landed me in the hospital until her birth late last night. 

It was the best Mother's Day gift I could ever ask for. 

Leo is extremely good with her; the best father of my child. Every time I catch him gazing at her, I feel the warmth of happiness hit me. 

I can't wait to share her birth with my family and friends. 

Happy Mother's day to me. My gift: Aliikai Finau