Still an hour and a half left before she had to return. She could return now, but even the thoughts of her room stifled her. These days, it felt as if the four walls were losing in on her, leaving her flustered and suffocated. She'd then call up her Mom; she made it go away, but for how long? As soon as the line disconnected, the sinking feeling would resume again. She could compare it to a pebble tossed from the beach into the vast, endless ocean. Who would miss an ordinary pebble?
She walked down the familiar sandy path, the one beside the bus stand, with Kesha blasting in her ears. She actually didn't need any kind of exercise. She was thin and unnaturally so and her hair was tied in a ponytail so that it wouldn’t stick to her neck.
She walked alone, with only her thoughts for company. She was sweating now. Wrinkling her nose, she went and sat down in her "special" place. This was HER special place. No one could harm her when she was there. No one could tease her or taunt her. She felt at peace there. Only one person she had bought there voluntarily. He could make her smile with his deep chocolate eyes. He used to listen patiently when she used to crib about her teachers. She felt proud that she was the one he was confiding in about girl problems or about his social life but also sad that she couldn’t be what he wanted; but as long as he was happy, so was she.
She sat there and thought about the previous year. Starting of friendships, discovering "watering holes", crushes, hookups, break ups. How everything had changed, how her group had slowly disintegrated. When they had finally opened their eyes, it was way too late, just too late.
Still an hour left. She got a Coke. She could just imagine her best friend's expression and her screech," Finally you are normal again girl."
She was sitting there lost in thought and suddenly her phone started blasting Feels Like Rain. It was one of her friends. "Oye, where are you?" "At my place" "Okay, we are at the maggi shop now. Come fast" "Hold on, i'm coming over."
She slowly got up and walked down her special place which made her so happy, so strong, and started to make her way towards the regular adda spot a.k.a the maggi shop, a regular hub for the students of her college.
A butterfly fluttered around her and sat demurely on her shoulder. She could see the last rays of the sun glinting of its orange wings and its antenna seemed to sparkle in the light of the dying sun.
Carefully she made her way to the maggi shop. She saw her friends laughing at some joke she had yet to know about. One of them turned and beckoned me. The feeling of being unloved and unwanted had disappeared. Yes, she had friends who would help her and never let her feel alone. She joined them, noticing that the butterfly was no longer on her shoulder; it had flown away high up in the sky. She was wistful but only for a moment then she was laughing at the next joke which was being cracked.
"Come on! Gotta go back now. Just 5 mins left." Her friends agreed and went strolling back to the hostel which had become their 2nd home in the one year they had being stayed there. “Come over later” she hollered. “Okay. Btw I got some awesome pics of Ian.” “Show them. He is so hot!!!!!”
Her other friend rolled her eyes “You are nuts.” She answered with a smile. And at that moment she knew, she’ll never be alone again.