Cullens Online

An Interactive Twilight Experience.

Down to the core

I gaze out into the stary night sky. He's been on my mind, and let's make sure He is plural. I hate being indecisive because I'm always the one making decisions. I had to make the decision whether or not to give my little brother my snack because he was till hungry, I had to make the decision that would decide if I would be separated from my parents from nearly the rest of my life by the age of ten. I made the decision to bottle my emotions in and be passive aggressive. Sadly, I made the decision of falling in love with him. I can't say his name, to many memories come to my mind. You know they say you either never loved the person, or you still do. I wish that wasn't the case because I miss him a lot. I learned to make my emotions camouflage so you can't really tell what I'm exactly going through. No matter what my heart always races for him, just like it did in the past. When Dylan came into my life I wondered what it was about him that drew me to him. He was like a guy version of me, I mean we like exactly the same music, have a love for Mexican food and we we're both shy. Two perfect pieces, and sometimes I worry if I made the right decision. Don't get me wrong, I love Dylan with all my heart, and much more. Yet he always tugs away at my heart, it's just the small things that matter. I remember when he and I were happy together, happy memories once upon a time ago. I didn't really mean to hurt him, no matter what you hear. But you all know me I majorly eff up great situations. So many things happened after that that hurt me deep to the core because I was silly to hang on. Maybe I'll face a new chapter in my life, or maybe my mind will remain in the gutter. What do you guys think? Because as always, I have no clue. Peace out my little loves, stay fierce.