Friend or Foe?

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He and I have never been the best of buddies. Quite the opposite, we pretty much hated being around each other. I could be talking about any of the members of my current or past pack – they all disliked being around me, I’m not going to hide that fact. Making those around suffer along with me, I didn’t really enjoy doing, though I made the impression that I did. I couldn’t help those thoughts come to me whenever I was around Sam. The first to snap at me was surprisingly not Paul – who I had expected – but it was Jacob. He was so wound up with the whole Bella situation that he needed to snap at someone – you could tell by his pathetic thoughts. That someone he needed to have a go at happened to be me. I guess the same could be said about me, all my emotions were building up and although I had a go at everyone it was never enough. I needed a moment to let everything go. That moment came when Jacob had a go at me.

Once that happened our relationship with each other couldn’t be more distant. We’d growl, insult, and throw hatred thoughts at each other, the works. I won’t lie; I was relieved when Jacob disappeared. However, the hate we had for each other wasn’t nearly as strong when he returned. When Jacob went through what I had gone through with Emily and Sam, it was like we had something in common – we did have something in common – we both had lost the one we loved, someone else got them. And surprisingly with that depressing similarity we began to understand each other more. Jacob could stand having me around in his pack, which was an achievement. He even said I was better than Paul – that was saying something.

However, now, I don’t know what to think about Jacob. In a way I remember that we once had a strong, yet miserable similarity, but then he’s gone and pretty much stabbed me in the back by imprinting on that spawn. He looks after my brother – the only remaining reason I latch on to, to not pull his head clean off his neck. I do admire Jacob for his slightly caring nature to some of his pack members (aka my brother), but I will never allow him to know that. All in all, I don’t know what the relationship is like with Jacob; it’s like a graph that goes up and down constantly. I think I detest him overall... but I can’t be sure.

[Sue Clearwater]

I can only imagine how hard it has been for you Leah, being a member of Sam's pack, would have been unbearable, I only hope that in joining Jacob's pack you have found some resemblence of peace.