I can't believe she is  2 days short of 3 months old. It feels like just yesterday she was born. 

I feel like I never get sleep anymore, but I honestly wouldn't have it any other way right now. For not even knowing if I would be a good mother and not sure I even wanted a child, I can't believe I ever thought that. Yes, I still get scared that I am not doing everything I can and should for her, or that something is missing from her life that she needs, but whenever I express that to Leo, he takes my hand and calls Rachel to watch Kai for an hour then takes me to the beach to calm me down. I really do have the best husband I could ask for. 

Every morning at 4:00 A.M she wakes me up for a feeding. I am usually just exhausted by 1:00 P.M. when it's time for her nap. 

Somehow through all the exhaustion, her beautiful blue eyes bring me enough energy to want to spend more time with her. It's like I can never get enough of her. She doesn't have much hair still, but her brown hair is coming in slowly. I love to put bows on her and make her look even cuter than I already know she is. She is extremely photogenic, I think my photos from the last 3 months on my phone are all related to Kai. 

I hope she keeps her brown hair and blue eyes. I never expected it, but I love it so much. 

I love my little Aliikai. 

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