It's Friday night at 8:00 PM, and I sit on my bed, typing this blog, thinking... Just thinking...


What is life?


Life is... Well, let's think... Is it doing something you enjoy? Or perhaps it is understanding what the hell we are doing here?

Maybe it's... being content with ourselves and being able to know why we do what we do.


I've had a very hard time these past 5 months... Just accepting the fact that I am unable to do dancing. Or horseback- the two things that brought tears to my eyes because I love them so much... It brings tears of sadness to my eyes now.


So, what do we do when we loose something we are fond of?

Fight for it? Deny it? Or...

Do we accept things that are too hard to accept?


I am on the verge of being literally unable to accept this... It is a tragedy of some form. But life... Life is how you perceive it.


I met a woman the other day who had a terrible disease and asked "Why is life so CRUEL?"

I couldn't answer... As I didn't actually know.

And then I asked myself: "Why IS life cruel?"

I came to the conclusion that life is what you perceive it as... For this woman, could she look at this disease as awful, and cruel, or she could see it as a chance to change herself and her life.


It applies to my leg as well. Is this injury cruel?

Yes and no. But why Yes?: It is keeping me from doing things I love: dance, running, jumping, playing, and simply walking... and horseback.

Why is it a blessing?: Because it is showing me what I want. I YEARN to swing dance... and Jazz dance again... I YEARN to be with my horses, riding freely as the wind whips through my hair down the dusty trail, knowing what life CAN be.

It CAN be wonderful... Or it CAN be like this. It isn't very nice right now, but pushing through it will enable me (over time: which SUCKS) to eventually get back to what I want to do. And now I know. This is NOT what I want.

Which is a motivation tool, of a sort.

"We are often apt to focus on what we lack... When one can grasp the concept of wealth through gratitude, it will be an easy road ahead."


Sure, we are ONLY human. But have you seen what humans can do?


Huge love,


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